As I am here, and in this moment, regardless of past pain and past doubt, I get to choose what comes next in my life. No matter the thorns in my flesh now, I can choose whether I will add to their number.
I am so sorry that you have endured so much suffering in life, Peter. You can rationalize that is has made you stronger, and is preparing you for great accomplishments in the future, but that doesn’t lessen the suffering. You truly did not deserve this - but I’d like to think that God is developing your character for future good works which will give you peace.
It has, at least, enabled you to write a worthwhile Substack that asks profound questions, and I’m grateful for that. You are building such wisdom and depth; it is a joy to interact with you.
My own experience is that when painful, undeserved things happen to you, especially in childhood, it cements a kernel of anger in your innermost soul. The result is that you might have to forgive certain people - including God, your family, yourself, and society - repeatedly, even over decades. More layers of anger and grieving keep welling up, until you gradually get it all out of your system. Maybe complete acceptance and forgiveness eludes you, but you get close to it - enough to achieve peace and closeness with God.
I am glad that you have the wisdom to have a deep, personal relationship with God. I think it will make all the difference in your future, affecting whether you sink or soar with angels. I daily pray for your happiness, Peter. “He heals the brokenhearted, and binds up their wounds” - Psalm 147:3
Life happens. I’m learning to live with that and move forward.
And I’m learning that it’s a process.
Which is why part of why I write these things. Don’t know if they will be a help to anyone else, but I’d like to think I’ve got something useful to share.
It’s a spiritual journey. It’s a healing journey. It’s an evolving journey.
I am so sorry that you have endured so much suffering in life, Peter. You can rationalize that is has made you stronger, and is preparing you for great accomplishments in the future, but that doesn’t lessen the suffering. You truly did not deserve this - but I’d like to think that God is developing your character for future good works which will give you peace.
It has, at least, enabled you to write a worthwhile Substack that asks profound questions, and I’m grateful for that. You are building such wisdom and depth; it is a joy to interact with you.
My own experience is that when painful, undeserved things happen to you, especially in childhood, it cements a kernel of anger in your innermost soul. The result is that you might have to forgive certain people - including God, your family, yourself, and society - repeatedly, even over decades. More layers of anger and grieving keep welling up, until you gradually get it all out of your system. Maybe complete acceptance and forgiveness eludes you, but you get close to it - enough to achieve peace and closeness with God.
I am glad that you have the wisdom to have a deep, personal relationship with God. I think it will make all the difference in your future, affecting whether you sink or soar with angels. I daily pray for your happiness, Peter. “He heals the brokenhearted, and binds up their wounds” - Psalm 147:3
Life happens. I’m learning to live with that and move forward.
And I’m learning that it’s a process.
Which is why part of why I write these things. Don’t know if they will be a help to anyone else, but I’d like to think I’ve got something useful to share.
It’s a spiritual journey. It’s a healing journey. It’s an evolving journey.